Pranking Mike
by lola51115
Summary: Bella And Edward are so sick of Mike! Now with help with the family lets see how they turn mikes world upside down. But what happens when they can't stop pranking? - Story i wrote a while agon - new account
1. Chapter 1

Bella's P.O.V.

I am so sick of Mike Newton always flirting with me!

When will it end?

While Edward was on one of his "hiking trips" this

morning, Mike took advantage of his absence and tried to

ask me out again at lunch.

I had hoped Alice would be there to back me up, but no,

she and Angela were giggling with their hands over their

mouths, just watching us.

"Why didn't you help me?" I complained after I sat down.

"It was just funny seeing the look on your face!" Alice

laughed. I glared at her, but I couldn't stay mad at her for

long, and she knew it.

"Sorry, Bella." Angela apologized. I smiled. "Don't worry

about it." I told her. "Where's Ben?"

"He got sick yesterday after school," Angela said.

"Stomach flu. I just hope it doesn't spread again." "Yeah,

that would be the last thing we need." I agreed.

Alice leaned forward. "So what are we going to do about

Newton?" She asked in a low voice.

"What do you mean?" I asked surprised. Angela raised her

eyebrows."We are going to prank him of course!" Alice

said in a surprised tone that implied I should have realized

this sooner.

"We need to prank him with something that will make him

realize that Bella is taken." Angela put in.

This surprised me. _Angela _was actually plotting to prank

someone with Alice!

We sat in silence for a few minutes, thinking of ideas.

Suddenly, Alice burst out; "Fake tattoos!" Two pairs of

eyes questioned her sanity.

"We should make fake tattoos," She said impatiently.

"Bella will wear one, and Edward will wear one! It's

perfect! I can see it now…"

What was funny was that she really could see it happening,

so I couldn't back out of it. "That's a good idea!" Angela

grinned. She and Alice looked at me.

"All right. I'll do it."

"You want me to wear _what_?" Edward asked. "It's a fake

tattoo!" Alice exclaimed to him while we were at their

house.

"I honestly don't see the point in wearing one. I won't do

it." Edward said firmly. He turned to go back to his piano.

"It's a prank on Mike Newton!" I called to him. He was

back at my side in a flash, his golden eyes lighting up. "I'm

in." He grinned mischievously.

"I made them already, too!" Alice held out her tiny hands,

where two fake tattoos sat there, still in their plastic

wrappers.

"This is going to be good…"


	2. Chapter 2

Edward's P.O.V.

Half of me saw no point in this childish prank, but the other

half just wanted to rub that vile Newton's face into the

ground.

I wanted to prove to him that Bella was _mine_.

When I saw the tattoos Alice had made, I nearly choked

with glee. Mike was going to love this!

Alice, Bella, Angela, and I already had the plan set. As we

pulled into the parking lot, I could see Angela standing by

her boyfriend Ben's car with an eager look on her face.

When we approached her, she asked, "Are you ready?"

Alice grinned. "Let's do this."

One by one, we all entered the school a few feet apart so

we wouldn't look suspicious. As I opened my locker door, I

saw Mike Newton enter the bathroom. Perfect. The prank

was in motion.

Right on cue, Angela began walking in my direction and

"accidentally" spilled her water bottle on my shirt.

Some watching students giggled. I heard Lauren think,

_what a dumbass! _I mentally growled at her, but it was for a

prank, so I let it go.

"I'm sorry, Edward." Angela said in her quiet voice,

sounding mortified. She was a good actress.

"It's all right." I told her. "I'll just go change." I pulled the

spare shirt I brought out of my locker and entered the

bathroom.

Mike Newton had just walked out of the stall and was

approaching the sinks when he saw me.

_I hope he did that in front of Bella. _He thought. _Maybe now_

_she'll realize what an idiot he is._

I walked to the other end of the room and pulled off my

shirt. I could feel Mike's eyes following me. Pervert.

_What the fuck! _His thoughts screamed.

I had placed the tattoo in my lower pelvic area. But that

wasn't the funny part.

The funny part was that the tattoo read, _**Bella was here.**_

There was also a small arrow pointing down.

Mike's eyes bulged, and he ran out of the bathroom, his

hands still covered in soap. _I have to find Bella!_

I laughed, and quickly put on the other shirt. When I

reentered the hall way, Mike had just spotted Bella and was

half-running toward her. Angela and Alice came up to me.

"So far so good." I told them.

They both had their hands over their mouths to stifle their

giggles.

Mike skidded to a halt in front of Bella. "Did you know

Cullen has a tattoo?" He gasped wildly.

The onlookers began whispering. _Perfect_. Alice thought.

_I'm recording this for Emmett and the other to see later._

"Of course, Mike!" Bella laughed. "Why else do you think

I got mine?"

She unzipped her jacket and pulled down the collar of her

blue shirt.

There on her chest was her tattoo that read, _**Edward was**_

_**here. **_with an arrow pointing down_**.**_

Several onlookers gasped and began whispering amongst

themselves. I couldn't stop smiling.

_Oh, how I love payback. _I thought. Mike's eyes opened

wider, and he darted into the cafeteria without a backward

glance.

Bella approached us, smiling broadly. Alice and Angela

were in hysterics, holding onto each other for support.

"It worked so perfectly!" Alice gasped.

"Maybe now Mike has learned his lesson." Bella said.


	3. Chapter 3

Bella's P.O.V.

I can't believe that the prank actually worked! Alice had a

natural high pretty much all day, but that's how she usually

acts, so there wasn't really a difference in her behavior.

When Edward and I approached his Volvo, he kissed me

lightly. "That worked perfectly, love." I grinned at him.

"You can remove the tattoo now if you want to."

He grinned crookedly back at me. "I think I'll leave it there

just to freak him out for a few more days. I just want to see

the look on his face."

He leaned down to kiss me again, but then Alice appeared

right behind him. He grimaced theatrically and turned

around. "What, Alice?"

"We should prank Newton again!" She squealed. Edward

rolled his eyes as we got into the car.

Alice and Edward continued to argue until we reached their

house. "I'm positive this one will work!" Alice pleaded

when we were in the living room. "What's going on?"

Rosalie asked, her eyes still on the TV.

"We are trying to prank Mike Newton again." Alice

explained. Esme stood up and closed the book she was

reading. "Don't do anything that would get you arrested."

She warned. Without further ado, she went upstairs.

"What do you mean, _again_?" Jasper asked. Alice pulled out

the camera she had at school and plugged it into the TV.

Rosalie, Jasper, and Emmett watched Mike Newton's

reaction to seeing mine and Edward's "tattoos". "That was

hilarious!" Emmett choked out after they were done

laughing. "What are you going to do next?"

"How about a prank call?" Rosalie suggested. "What will

Newton be doing tonight?" Alice's eyes seemed to unfocus

before they came back to reality. "He's going to be

watching The Ring with Tyler Crowley." She laughed.

"Perfect!" Edward said. I stared at him, surprised. "It's too

good of an opportunity to pass up." He explained to me.

"All right," I said. "I'll do it."

"Jasper will do the scary voice," Alice began scheming,

"And Rosalie and Emmett will be at Newton's house to

record the whole thing…"

There I was, sitting on the couch surrounded by vampires.

Emmett and Rosalie were perched in trees in Mike

Newton's front yard, well hidden from view. Emmett had a

video camera; Rosalie, a walkie-talkie.

Jasper, Alice, Edward and I were all sitting in a circle

around the cordless phone. Edward had the other walkietalkie

clutched in his hand.

Finally, Rosalie's voice came through. "He just got past the

part where they got the phone call. You can call him now."

Jasper grinned and dialed Mike's number. Rosalie still had

the walkie-talkie on so we could hear Mike's reaction.

It rang once, and then we heard a shrill scream. Edward and

I were choking back laughter. Finally, Mike answered. He

then said something that made our prank go from funny to

hilarious.

"You're on speakerphone." His voice was high-pitched, as

if he just got kicked where it hurts.

Jasper grinned evilly and said in a dangerous and disturbing

tone, "Seven days….."

Mike and Tyler's resulting screams were deafening. Jasper

quickly hung up so they wouldn't hear our laughter.

We were still rolling on the floor when Emmett and Rosalie

came in.

"Time to put these babies on YouTube!"


	4. Chapter 4

Bella's P.O.V.

"Are you sure this one will work?" I asked uneasily. "I feel

bad getting Charlie into this." Alice looked at me. "I'm

positive this one will work. I saw Charlie's reaction. He'll

laugh and all will be forgiven. It's April Fool's anyway."

She reminded me.

We both turned to look at Edward, who was playing my

lullaby on his piano. "I'm perfectly willing to do it if it

means embarrassing Mike Newton." He scowled at the

mere mention of his name.

"Jealous, much?" Jasper laughed as he entered the room.

"Yes." Edward said shortly. "Bella is mine and no one

else's."

"Greed isn't a good emotion either." Emmett smirked from

the living room. Edward threw a pillow at him. "Shut up."

Emmett grinned wider. "Did you post the videos on

YouTube?" I asked him. He nodded. "There were over a

thousand views in less than an hour. It was great!"

We all laughed. "What user was it under? What if Mike

finds out?" Rosalie asked."It's under the user MikeSucks,

and we are from Pakistan," Emmett grinned. "He won't

find out."

"What do we have to do for the next prank?" Rosalie asked

Alice.

"Edward will bring Bella back to her house tomorrow

morning before school. Charlie will still be there," She

explained, her gold eyes excited. "They will pretend to get

into an argument and Edward will drive off. When Charlie

asks what's wrong, Bella will tell him."

"Tell him what?" I asked. Alice leaned forward and

whispered it into my ear.

Our entire circle was shaking with laughter, while Edward

looked disgruntled. "Why Mike? Why couldn't it have been

Jacob?" He grumbled.

I hugged him soothingly. "If it was Jacob, then Charlie

would be pleased not angry, you know that. Besides, it's

not real."

He kissed me gently. "All right. Call Angela. She can be in

on it, too."

I nodded eagerly, and Alice handed me her cell phone.

After I dialed her number, it rang four times before her

younger brother Isaac answered.

"Hello?" He answered. "This is Bella Swan," I told him.

"Is Angela there?"

"Yeah, hang on. Angela!" He called away from the phone.

"It's Bella!" After Angela received the phone, she said,

"Hey, Bella! What's up?"

"We have another idea for a prank on Mike. Are you in?"

She laughed. "Of course! What's the plan?"

I wasn't even done explaining the prank to her, before she

was nearly screaming with laughter. "It's perfect!" She

choked. "What do I have to do?"

"Here's the plan…"

Edward and I were sitting in his Volvo as it tore down my

street. He had the same disgruntled look on his face. I

kissed him firmly. "This will work out perfectly. Trust me."

I said. He nodded, and pulled up in front of my house just

as Charlie stepped onto the porch.

I jumped out of the car. "Why would you do something like

that to me, Bella?" Edward shouted. Only I could see the

pained look on his face. This was torturing him. "It wasn't

my fault!" I pleaded. I slammed the car door and Edward

drove off.

As a walked over to my truck, Charlie grabbed me by the

shoulders. "What's going on?" He asked. "Do you two

have a fight?"

"Yes!" I sobbed to him. "About what?" he asked. He was

clearly thinking I was going to leave again.

"Do you remember that party Mike Newton threw a couple

of weeks ago, the one I said I wasn't going to go to?" He

nodded, wary.

"Well, I went instead of going to Edward's like I told you."

Charlie's eyes widened, but he didn't say anything. I took

that as my cue to continue.

"Well, Charlie…"

I drove to school, smiling broadly. So far so good. Charlie

was following behind me in his cruiser, I knew. He was

trying to keep me from noticing, but Alice told me he

would.

I pulled into the parking lot next to Edward's Volvo. I could

see him with a very sad look on his face. He was a good

actor.

When I got out of my truck, I pretended to be nauseous.

Edward strode right into the building without looking at

me. He was playing his part well.

When I opened my locker, Angela ran up to me. "I can't

believe he would do such a thing!" She glared in Edward's

direction, but she wasn't glaring at Edward. She was

glaring at Mike, who was conveniently standing next to

him, watching the whole charade.

Mike thought Angela was glaring at Edward, and he grew

smug. _Perfect, _I thought. _Here comes Charlie._

Sure enough, I saw Charlie's cruiser pull into the parking

lot. He got out and stormed up to the doors.

As he came in, Edward slid over to my side of the hallway.

Charlie stormed right up to Mike. Nearly everyone in the

hallway was watching. Whispers and giggles could be

heard up and down the hall.

Angela and Alice were hiding behind Ben and Edward,

choking back giggles, since both of them couldn't keep a

straight face for very long.

"HOW DARE YOU GET MY DAUGHTER

PREGNANT?" Charlie roared, spittle flying everywhere.

The whispers paused for a moment, and then flared again. I

saw eyes darting between me, Mike, and Edward. Edward's

lips were twitching.

Mike's face fell into one of horror. "Sir-I didn't-"

"DON'T LIE TO ME!" Charlie roared. "BELLA TOLD

ME HERSELF! HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN HER

TATTOO?"

Mike's eyes darted to me. I pulled down the collar of my

shirt again. This time, where Edward's name was, **Mike**

**was here. **Could be seen in bold letters.

Mike's mouth opened and closed like a fish. He darted into

an empty classroom while Charlie was turned away.

I couldn't hold it in anymore. I burst out laughing, and

Angela and Alice followed suit.

"Bella?" Charlie asked, worried for my sanity. "What's

going on?"

"It was a prank!" I choked out. "I'm not pregnant!"

The whispers in the hall turned to laughs. Edward was

grinning behind me, holding a camera.

Charlie froze, and then he grinned. "Well, I sure fell for that

one, didn't I?"


	5. Chapter 5

BPOV:

I was genuinely surprised that Charlie wasn't mad at me

after that last prank. It was a little extreme, but it was

hilarious though!

Edward put it up on YouTube yesterday, and got over 2000

views in one day. Emmett was ecstatic at that news. I think

he's obsessed with YouTube.

At the end of the day, Angela, Alice and I were sitting up in

my room. Alice was bouncing up and down, and I knew she

had another prank in mind.

"What's your idea, Alice?" I asked her, wary. Angela

grinned at my expression.

"Wouldn't it be great if Mike walked in on you guys?" She

asked, her eyes alight.

"I take 'you guys' to mean me and Edward, correct?" I

asked. "Duh!" Alice rolled her eyes.

"How does Edward feel about this?" Angela asked. "Will

he do it?" "Of course!" Alice told her. "He's the one who

came up with it."

My mouth fell open. Edward was willing to lower some of

his precious boundaries to embarrass Mike Newton?

Suddenly, the door bell rang. I got up and went downstairs.

Sure enough, it was Edward.

He leaned down to give me a kiss in greeting, but for once,

I stopped him. "Do you really come up with a prank for

Mike Newton to walk in on us?" I asked him.

Edward smiled crookedly at me. "Of course. Then again, I

only meant walking in on us kissing, of course. Not youknow-

what."

I blushed, and he grinned wider. "Of course." I said quietly.

He leaned down to kiss me and this time I did not object.

"Are you guys done sucking face yet?"

I whirled around. Alice and Angela were standing at the

foot of the stairs, watching us. Angela looked horrified at

intruding on us, while Alice was smiling.

Edward was smiling at the look on my face. "Fine, I'm in.

What do I have to do?" I said.

Edward's grin widened.

Edward and I drove up to a place called Promontory Point,

which jutted out over La Push and had a good view of the

ocean. Most of us teenagers went there with our dates and

to just hang out if we wanted.

He found out that Mike was going to be there with some

friends at a weekend barbeque, which was perfect. They

were holding said BBQ not far from where Edward so

conveniently parked, which was good.

As we pulled up, I saw Mike's eyes bulge. He was clearly

thinking of ways to bail from his friends; I could tell by

Edward's expression.

Tyler Crowley and Eric Yorkie were now staring at the car

too. They may not be able to see who exactly was inside it,

but they at least had an idea on what we were here for.

I could hear Mike's loud groan. "I hope it's not Emmett

again." He complained. I was covering my mouth to stifle

the giggles that threatened to explode out and blow my

cover.

Edward shot a devious smile toward me. Mike and his

friends then moved farther down the cliff side, toward

picnic tables that were set up. They were far enough from

us that they couldn't see us over Jasper's car. He and Alice

had arrived before Mike and his friends did.

"Are you okay?" Alice then asked as she ran over to the

car.

"You guys had better start sucking face, because I'm going

to get Mike!" She whispered to us.

Edward nodded and then looked at me as Alice turned

away. "You don't have to do this, you know."

I rolled my eyes. "We are already up here, Edward. I can't

back out now." He nodded slowly, still unsure.

Finally, I leaned forward and grabbed the collar of his shirt.

"Besides, it's not like I don't want to." I whispered. He

shivered, and then climbed into the back seat with me.

He pressed his lips gently to mine, trying to keep a level

head, but then, out of the blue, Jasper started sending waves

of lust toward us from his car.

This time, Edward pressed his lips to mine with a new

fervor. He was now just as eager as I was. I was looking

forward to this.


	6. Chapter 6

Alice's Point of View

I ran human speed toward where Mike was standing with

his friends. "Can you help me?" I asked him, throwing

worry and nervousness into my tone.

"What wrong?" Mike asked, wary."Is it Bella?" "Yes!" I

moaned.

"She came up here with Jacob Black and he's pressuring

her into sex in a car she borrowed from Edward!"

Mike dropped the bag of Doritos he was eating and

followed me to Edward's car, where he and Bella were.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Tyler said. "What if it's

another prank?" Mike was actually stupid enough to ignore

him and threw open the back door.

Tyler groaned in embarrassment, while Eric just stood

there, stunned.

Bella was lying across the back seat with Edward above her

with no shirt on. He actually had one of his hands halfway

up Bella's shirt as well.

"Damn you, Jasper." He said at vampire speed. I heard

Jasper snicker in our car.

Bella was blushing furiously, and I knew she wasn't faking.

Mike just turned around and half-ran toward his car, with

Eric and Tyler at his heels.

"I told you, dude."


	7. Chapter 7

Bella's P.O.V.

"Why, Jasper?" I moaned. "Why did you have to pull that

stupid stunt?"

Jasper smirked at me. "It was hilarious, and you know it."

"Yeah, but Edward didn't want to lower his precious

_boundaries_." I complained. "So your prank backfired."

I could hear Emmett snort from the living room. "Tired of

waiting in the virgin waiting room, Bella?"

I stormed into the room just in time for Rosalie to say, "The

virgin waiting room? Where the hell did you get that

from?"

Emmett shrugged and hollered back, "I saw it on the

internet somewhere!"

Rosalie scoffed, "I'm surprised you know how to turn on a

computer."

Emmett shot an evil grin at me before he said, "Of course I

know how work the Google on the internet machine!

Where do you think I get my ideas for our various

sexcapades?"

My elbow slid off the table with a bang and Jasper was

howling with laughter at my blush. "Shut up." I told him.

"Where are Edward and Alice?" I asked Rosalie.

"They went hunting. They should be back in a few minutes.

I have a marvelous idea for a new prank on Mike!" Less

than a minute later, Alice burst through the door; Edward

right behind her.

"What's your idea, Rose?" She asked eagerly. We all took

places in the living room as Rosalie explained her idea.

Edward began to laugh. "It's perfect! Alice, can you see

this working?"

"Yes!" she squealed in her high, tinkling voice. We all

began laughing harder.

Time to begin phase 5: Internet Alarm.

Just after midnight, Rosalie and Emmett were once again

conveniently hidden in the trees in Mike's front yard. This

time Jasper was with them. They had cameras and walkietalkies

at the ready.

Alice was on her laptop computer in the living room and

Edward and I were with her.

"Are you ready?" Alice asked Rosalie.

"Yes." Rosalie's voice came back through. "Go ahead. He's

on myspace now. Send the bulletin."

Jasper managed to hack into Mike's myspace account and

add the fake account we created to his friend's list. We had

an account under the name TheMysteriousPerson. Mike

had over 500 friends already, so he wouldn't notice if one

more was added.

Alice sent him a bulletin titled "READ THIS. SCARILY

ACCURATE."

Emmett had his finger pressed on the call button on his

walkie-talkie so we could hear Mike's reaction. "Jasper,

send in the dread." He whispered eagerly.

Jasper began throwing waves of dread at Mike, enough to

frighten him, but not enough to make him keep from

opening the bulletin.

"He's opening it now." Rosalie whispered. Then Mike

began reading it out loud.

"_DON'T STOP READING this or something VERY BAD_

_will happen to you as soon as you are done reading. This is_

_extremely freaky. Be careful what you open._

_During a thunderstorm ..._

_Beth: Hey Ben! Sup?_

_Ben: Uhhh ... nothing much about to go to a party ... haha_

_you?_

_Beth: Haha nice ... uhhh just staying in for the night._

_Ben: I have this huge favor to ask you ..._

_Beth: Yeah ... what?_

_Ben: Can you please come over and watch my brother John_

_for me? I won't be able to go if no one watches him._

_Beth: Ughh ... well ..._

_Ben: Please Beth!_

_Beth: *Sighs* Alright. I'll be over in a few minutes._

_A few minutes later, Beth arrives at Ben's house._

_Ben: Hey, thanks so much!_

_Beth: Hehe. No problem. By the way, you look really nice._

_Ben: Thanks! Anyways, here's my number. Call me in about_

_an hour and tell me how everything is, okay?_

_Beth: Alright, bye!_

_Then Ben left. Beth headed over to John._

_Beth: Hey sport!_

_John: Hi Beth ... I'm really scared ..._

_Beth: Awww ... don't be. I'm here. Let's turn on some T.V._

_As Beth walked over to the T.V. , the lights suddenly shut_

_out. John freaked out and screamed!_

_Beth: John, it's okay. I have a flashlight. Hold on, one_

_second. Darn it! The flashlight doesn't work! Uhmmm ..._

_okay, okay, let's go up to your brother's room. I think he_

_has an extra one._

_John: *mumbles* okay._

_As Beth and John headed up towards Ben's room, they_

_heard a creepy laughter that brought chills up their spines._

_John: *screams* What was that?_

_Beth: John, stop doing that. Let me call your brother and_

_ask where the flashlight is._

_John: But I didn't ... *John's voice started to fade away ...*_

_Beth: Hey Ben! How's the party?_

_Ben: Good, thanks! Listen I got to go. Can I call you in 5_

_minutes?_

_Beth: Sure. But where's the flashlight in your room?_

_Ben: Oh, ummm ... it's under my bed, to the left. I think._

_Beth walks over to Ben's bed and screams._

_Beth: Oh my God!_

_Ben: What happened?_

_Beth: Oh, ha-ha. Nothing, I didn't know you had a clown_

_statue in your bedroom. It scared me half to death_

_especially the bloody knife on its hand. It looks so real!_

_Where did you get it? Did you get it at the Halloween_

_store?_

_Ben: Beth ... I don't have a clown statue in my bedroom._

_The line quickly goes dead. Ben started panicking and_

_raced home as fast as he can. When he got home, he ran_

_into his bedroom, where Beth and John were nowhere to be_

_seen. He saw his brother lying on his bed._

_Ben: *rolls his eyes and said to himself* I can't believe_

_Beth would play such an awful trick on me._

_He went and sat down at his computer and pulled up_

_myspace. He went into his myspace account and checked_

_his bulletins. He noticed that he had a random new friend._

_The profile picture was a freaky clown face. That made him_

_freak out a bit. Then he saw that the mysterious clown_

_friend had posted a bulletin called "Clowning Around"._

_Ben opened the bulletin and started to read it. This was the_

_same bulletin that he saw last night about a clown who_

_kills people. He got freaked out and didn't repost it._

_Trembling, he got in his bed, next to his brother and kissed_

_his cheek good night._

"_You can sleep here with me tonight, Sport. Good night."_

_Suddenly, the figure in the bed turned to Ben._

_Clown: Now it's your turn."_


	8. Chapter 8

Mike shivered. "Please," He scoffed. "That isn't real." His

body language suggested otherwise. He was shaking in his

seat, thanks to Jasper's ability.

However, the entire time he was reading the bulletin,

Emmett climbed into his room dressed as an evil clown and

a knife covered with fake blood in his hand.

Mike had a queen-sized bed, which made this prank

spectacular. Emmett was already lying across the bed; in

the shadows where Mike wouldn't see him until he spoke.

Mike got into his bed and pulled the blanket over himself.

"Now." Rosalie told him in vampire speed.

Emmett sat up slowly and winked at the camera Jasper was

holding. Then he leaned closer to Mike's ear and

whispered; "Now it's your turn." Mike froze for one instant

and let out a blood-curdling scream.

Emmett dived out the window and they were half-way

down the street before Mike even realized who it was.

_**One week later….**_

We were all situated in Edward's living room; still hyped

up over the clown prank on Mike that happened nearly a

week ago.

"That was brilliant!" I laughed. "Our best yet!" Edward had

his arm around my shoulder and he was laughing with me.

Suddenly, Carlisle stormed into the room. "I have a Mr.

Mike Newton in psychiatric care trying to conquer his

sudden fear of clowns. Would any of you care to explain?"


	9. Chapter 9

Bella's Point of View

Every hand in the room was pointed at Emmett. "Traitors."

He grumbled.

"Let me rephrase this," Carlisle said, "Who was the

mastermind?"

Only Emmett was pointing at Rosalie. Everyone else was

still pointing at him. "Nice try, Emmett Cullen." Carlisle

said sternly.

I could see Edward and the others fighting back smiles.

Then Carlisle spoke again. "Emmett, I want you to go up to

the school tomorrow and apologize in front of him."

Emmett started to protest, but Carlisle held up a hand. "You

will also take responsibility for the other pranks pulled on

him."

Finally, Emmett spoke up. "It was Alice and Edward, too!"

He complained. However, Carlisle refused to hear it.

"Tomorrow." He said with finality.

"I graduated already!" Emmett called to him. "How am I

supposed to go to the school and apologize?"

Carlisle returned to the room, completely oblivious to the

rest of us shaking in our seats holding back laughter.

"I have it taken care of. You are there completing an

assignment for college."

Emmett groaned, defeated. "Fine." He grumbled.

After Carlisle left again, the room exploded with laughter.

"Thanks, Rosalie." Emmett told her. She hugged him. "I

had to do it. It was too good of an opportunity to pass up."

"Maybe we should turn the apology into another prank." I

said slyly. Edward looked at me incredulously.

"Seriously?" He asked me.

I shrugged. "Of course. In a way, it would still be an

apology. We'll just tweak it a little bit."

Emmett shivered in anticipation. "I have an idea already!"

Jasper rolled his eyes. "Your ideas aren't always the best

ones." He told him. "Are you sure about this?"

"Of course." Emmett bragged. "This will be as easy as

killing a bear with your bare hands."

I looked at Edward. He shrugged."It is pretty easy, but I

wouldn't take Emmett's word for it." He said indifferently.

He then neatly dodged a punch thrown by Emmett.

Edward pulled into the parking lot the next day and pulled

the key from the ignition. He then turned to me, his eyes

alight. "I saw a vision Alice had," He told me. "And

Carlisle will find out about this one. Will you take

responsibility for it?"

I gaped at him. "Why? Then he will tell Charlie!"

Edward laughed. "He won't. He will think that Emmett

tried to force the blame on you. It'll be funny."

This time, I laughed with him. "All right."

He grin grew wider when he saw Emmett's jeep park next

to us.

As we approached the building and where Mike was

standing, Edward laughed quietly. "What?" I asked him.

"He is still scarred for life from the scene at promontory

point." I blushed, and Edward smiled his crooked grin.

Emmett walked right up to Mike with his head low, but his

was still several inches taller than Mike.

"Hi, Mike." He murmured, sounding guilty. Several

surrounding students stopped to watch.

"Emmett," Mike said, wary. "What is it?"

He had bags under his eyes, as if he hadn't gotten a good

night's sleep in a long time. This made me giggle.

Emmett then looked at Mike, raising his head. He had an

object clutched in his large hand. I just wanted to say that

I'm sorry."

"For what?" Mike asked him, relieved that nothing bad

happened. Yet.

Emmett then began to grin slowly. "For this!" He then

whipped his hand up and pulled on the same clown mask

he wore when we first scared Mike.

Mike's relieve face turned to one of horror, and he let out a

loud scream. He began to run, but Emmett chased him

around the parking lot, yelling.

Alice and Edward were heaving with laughter, clutching

each other for support. Angela approached me. "What's

going on?"

I motioned to Emmett still chasing Mike.

Realization dawned on Angela's face.

"Oh, yeah! I saw this on You Tube last night."


	10. Chapter 10

_**BPOV:**_

"Emmett! I can't believe that you would do that!" Carlisle

exploded. Emmett seemed to shrink under his gaze.

We all were back at the Cullens again; Alice persuaded

Charlie to let me stay for a few days.

"You are over one hundred years old! You need to grow

up." Carlisle continued. Edward nudged me, and I took that

to be my signal.

I stood up, my face resigned. "Carlisle, it was me. I came

up with the idea." Carlisle's face became soft, before it

became furious again.

"How dare you try to blame Bella!" He yelled at Emmett.

Emmett's face suddenly became bewildered. "What? I

didn't-"

"Don't lie to me." Carlisle said sternly. "Bella would never

do such a thing."

Finally, Carlisle took notice of every single one of us

shaking with laughter. "Will someone please explain to me

what on earth is going on?"

Edward then stood up. "It was us. We all did it, even

Angela Weber. We were trying to get revenge on Mike

Newton because he keeps hitting on Bella."

Carlisle's face softened as he turned back to Emmett. "I'm

sorry for blaming you."

Emmett shrugged, grinning. "It's no big deal! Besides, it

was fun anyway."

Carlisle then turned back to the rest of us as he spoke. "I

don't want you to play anymore pranks on Mike Newton,

do you hear me? He's going through enough trouble

because of his fear of clowns, which you started!"

He strode from the room, just before we started laughing.

"There goes our pranking spree." I said, pretending to be

sad. Edward wrapped his arm around my shoulders, and I

leaned into him.

When I looked up again, Alice was already at the computer

desk, surfing the internet.

"What are you looking up now, Alice?" Jasper asked her. "I

need new ideas." She explained to us.

"Check that out!" Emmett pointed at the screen. "What

about that video?"

Alice and Jasper groaned simultaneously."We are not

watching 'two girls, one cup' again!" Jasper told him.

"That was disgusting!"

"What's that?" I asked Edward, confused. "Just a really

horrible video. You won't like it, trust me." I let it drop

after that.

Then Emmett spoke up again. "Way to get kicked out of

Wal-Mart." He read from the screen. "This has potential."

Alice grinned evilly. "I can see it now…"


	11. Chapter 11

Bella's Point of View

Alice just found a list of ways to get kicked out of Wal-

Mart. Great. This is definitely going to be good. "Are you

ready, Bella?" Alice asked, dancing up to me with an eager

gleam in her eyes.

"As ready as I'll ever be." I sighed. Alice then grabbed my

hand and yanked me out to the Volvo. As I passed, I could

hear Rosalie snickering.

"You're coming too, Rose!" Alice called back. "There's no

getting out of this one. Everybody will participate, just like

with the pranks!"

Emmett leapt up eagerly, followed by Jasper and Rose.

Edward was already behind the wheel of the Volvo.

"Eager to get started, Ed?" Emmett laughed. Edward rolled

his eyes. "Don't call me that. I just don't trust you or Alice

driving my car."

I snorted, and then Alice whirled around to smirk at me.

"Guess what, Bella?" "What?" I asked warily. "I have the

perfect prank for you to pull at Wal-Mart!"

I groaned and Edward laughed. "What is it, Alice?" All she

did was shake her pixie head. "You have to wait and see!"

"Why me?" I moaned. We were sitting amongst the

recliners in the furniture section and Alice had just told me

what my task was.

"I don't want to embarrass anyone!" I complained. No one

was paying attention to me. Everyone was just laughing

and making their recliners shake. "It's okay, Bella."

Edward and Alice said simultaneously. "It's all in good

fun." Alice assured me.

Resigned, I stood up and Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie fell

silent. "All right. I'll do it."

Alice began clapping. "Go get 'em, Bella!"

I began strolling down the aisle only to see a young couple

walk arm in arm in my direction. I sent a pained glance

back at Alice, who motioned as if to say, _You may proceed._

I sighed again, and marched up to the brown-haired man,

who had goo-goo eyes for his girlfriend.

I slapped him across the face as hard as I could.

The man was staring at me flabbergasted, so I screamed in

his face, "What the hell is this? I though what we had was

special!"

I whirled around and stormed back to the Cullens. I could

hear the girl screaming at her soon-to-be ex-boyfriend.

"Who was she? What's going on? ARE YOU CHEATING

ON ME?"

When I came back to where Alice and the others were

sitting, I burst out laughing with them. It _was _pretty funny.

"Emmett!" I said brightly. "It's your turn."

Emmett just grinned at me. "Bring it on."

"Your task is..."


	12. Chapter 12

"Your task is to strip down to your underwear and run

human speed through the store while Jasper is throwing

waves of lust to all the other customers." I finished smugly.

Emmett's face fell slightly, while Edward and Jasper were

roaring with laughter; Rosalie looked delighted. "Go ahead,

Emmett!" She said eagerly.

Alice was grinning madly. "This will definitely be good!" I

sat down in the recliner and leaned back.

Emmett stood up slowly, his curly hair slightly

drooping."All right. Jasper let's get this over with."

Jasper jumped up eagerly and followed him to the next

aisle over. "Good task, Bella." Edward told me.

"Definitely." Rosalie agreed.

"Keep your hands to yourself, Rose." Alice reminded her,

and Rosalie's face fell slightly and she pouted.

"Ok," Emmett's voice said. "I'm ready." He and Jasper

came back around the aisle, just in time for me to turn

away. I had no interest in seeing Emmett half naked.

After a moment, Emmett said, "You can look, Bella."

Thankfully, he was only wearing a pair of boxers. I looked

up directly into his face and told him, "You may begin."

Emmett sighed and said, "I might as well enjoy this." He

immediately jumped into the next aisle with a loud,

"WHOO!"

Then he began running through the store. Almost

immediately, Jasper's waves of lust began to overpower

everyone and they began chasing him.

It was very disturbing to see men chasing a guy who was in

his underwear.

Suddenly, a teenage girl jumped straight into Emmett's

path. "Hi!" She said breathlessly. "I'm Izzy! Will you

marry me?" She asked in a half crazed voice.

Emmett gaped at her, then just ran around her. Not to be

discouraged, Izzy followed him. "I'm still here!" She

screamed.

As Emmett rounded the store, he said to Edward, "Help

me!"

Edward smiled and nodded to Jasper, who sent waves of

boredom and disgust to the shoppers, including Izzy.

While the others went back to their shopping, Izzy just

stared at Emmett before she screamed, "I'm still going to

marry you someday!" Then she left.

Emmett sank back into his chair after getting dressed again.

"I'm really surprised we haven't been kicked out by now."

Alice said.

"Yeah, no kidding." Emmett told the pixie vampire. "I pick

Edward for the next task." He grinned evilly.

Suddenly, Edward said, "Listen!"

We all froze just in time to see the same couple I harassed

earlier walk right past us. One again, the girl was screaming

at the guy."Now you're chasing men? YOU ARE SUCH A

MANWHORE!"

There was a moment of stunned silence, before we burst

out laughing.


	13. Chapter 13

Emmett turned to Edward, his face smug. "You're

challenge is to pretend to drown in that kiddie pool over

there." He pointed to the Toy Department where a child's

swimming pool was conveniently placed in the middle of

the department full of water.

"Okay…." Edward said slowly. "I see no point in this,

however." "Edward, the tasks are supposed to be

pointless!" Alice reminded him.

Edward sighed in resignation. "Fine." He got up and

walked to the Toy Department. He glanced in both

directions before he threw himself into the pool.

He didn't even do anything before we started laughing. I

had never seen Edward act like this, and frankly; it was

hilarious, to say the least.

Water splashed all over the aisle before Edward began

thrashing around in the pool. "Oh, dear God! Help me! I'm

drowning! I see a long white tunnel!"

Several people stopped to stare at him; some even threw

money, thinking that it was a show. "Don't throw money at

me, THROW A LIFE PRESERVER!" He yelled.

Finally, one man came out of the crowd to lend a hand.

Edward grabbed it, but suddenly a voice cried out, "WHAT

IS WITH YOU AND MEN?"

It was our oh-so-special couple, back again for more

torture. The man dropped Edward's hand, horrified. "I was

just trying to help him, Bella!"

For a moment, I thought he was talking to me, but then I

realized that his girlfriend's name was Bella too, which

Emmett and the others found hilarious.

"Don't lie to me, Jacob! He isn't really drowning!" Bella

screamed. By this point, even Edward was laughing at the

irony of the situation.

"Wow, Bella!" Emmett howled. "She has your name!" The

other Bella looked over at me, and her face grew even more

furious than it was. "So you are dating ANOTHER Bella?

Am I not good enough for you?"

They began yelling once more when Edward came back

over to us, his clothes soaked. "Anything else?" He asked

wryly.

"Of course!" Emmett beamed. "Now you have to go up to

an assistant and ask for mayonnaise."

"That's it?" Edward asked, confused. Then he grinned,

seeing the rest of Emmett's plan in his mind.

He then went straight to an employee, whose tag also read:

BELLA. How many Bella's really live here?

"Can I have some mayonnaise?" he asked in a formal tone.

"Sir, I don't have any." The girl replied. Then Edward

stomped his foot. "Now how am I supposed to paint my

toenails?"

Then the rest of us howled with laughter as Edward

stormed off, still in his soaked clothes.

Once Edward bought new clothes to change into, he turned

to Alice. "Your turn."

Alice smiled at him. "Bring it on Eds."

Edward scowled for a moment before he said, "Pretend the

intercom is the voice of God." Alice stood up without

another word.

She knew when the intercom would come on, so she was

ready. She wandered the store until she was in the grocery

department when the intercom came on.

"Cleanup in aisle 12. Cleanup in aisle 12."

Alice fell to her knees, her hands thrown up into the air.

"God has spoken!" She yelled, completely playing the

part. The customers began staring at her, fearing for her

sanity. Alice jumped up and ran over to an old woman.

"Did you hear that? God spoke to me!"

Then Alice skipped off as if nothing happened. "Jasper,

you're next."


	14. Chapter 14

Jasper sat up straighter in the chair. "What do I have to

do?" He asked in a formal voice.

Alice smirked at him, and he seemed to shrink back under

her gaze. I giggled for a little bit. "Your task is to get into a

huge panic over the intercom voices."

He stood up, grateful that there wasn't any more. He

brushed his honey blonde hair out of his face before Alice

said, "There is also a second part. I won't tell you what it is

until you do this one first."

Finally, Jasper slowly walked over to the music section and

began browsing through the CDs. I saw no point in him

doing this; the Cullens had them all anyway.

Once again, the intercom came on. "Alexie, you're needed

in the shoe department; Alexie, you're need in the shoe

department." An employee from the music department left

the scene, so Jasper wouldn't get in trouble later.

Jasper fell to the ground. "THE VOICES! OH GOD, THE

VOICES! WHY WON'T THEY STOP?" He screamed.

The old woman Alice talked to earlier came up to him.

"Don't panic, lad! It's the voice of God!"

"I think that woman is senile!" Emmett whispered loudly,

and we all laughed.

"What's the second part?" Jasper asked in the same formal

tone after he came back over to us. "You have to go up to

customer service…"

I didn't hear the last part, because Alice whispered it to

him.

Rosalie and Edward were fighting back smiles, while

Emmett was shaking with laughter.

"What's going on?" I asked Edward, confused. "Just

listen," He told me soothingly as Jasper strode away.

"You'll see."

After about two minutes silence, a voice came over the

intercom. "Anita Hoare, Mike Rotch, and Hugh Jass, your

friend is looking for you."

There was another moment of stunned silence before we

were all roaring with laughter. "Sweet Jesus," Emmett

gasped. "That was the funniest thing yet!" Apparently,

Jasper had to make up rude names to announce over the

intercom.

Jasper came around the corner, smirking as he did. "Like

the names?" he asked as he sat down again. "Of course!"

Rosalie nearly squealed.

Just as we thought we were finished laughing, three kids

came around the corner. "Mike, who was it that called us?"

A girl asked."I don't know, Anita!" a boy snapped. "Shut

up, Hugh!" Mike snapped to the other boy.

We all stared at each other before the laughter began again;

this time it was louder than ever. "Rosalie," Jasper gasped.

"Your turn."


	15. Chapter 15

As Rosalie started grinning, I stood up. "Where are you

going?" Edward asked as they all looked at me.

"The bathroom," I replied. "You can do the task without me

if you want."

Emmett grinned back at me. "With pleasure."

As I strode off, I began to think. People here in Port

Angeles are very strange. There's an old woman who really

does believe the intercom voices is the voice of God, there

is a guy whose name is actually Hugh Jass, and a girl who's

obsessed with Emmett.

I'm glad she doesn't live in Forks.

I'm also very surprised that we haven't been kicked out by

now. Perhaps people here frequently do things like this.

Creepy. I guess I'll just have to get used to it.

After I left the bathroom, I abruptly ran into a large crowd

that was convened near the toy department. I could hear

some people laughing and others whispering darkly.

I pushed my way through the crowd to see Alice standing

there with a giant water gun that was almost as tall as she

was. "Just put her down, and no one will get hurt." She said

to someone in the aisle.

I leaned around a large man to see Rosalie sitting on the

floor of the aisle. She had a Barbie swimming pool on the

ground in front of her with several beta fish swimming

inside.

She was holding a Barbie doll that was duct taped and tied

to a string above the water. This Barbie was an exact

replica of Rosalie, but it was nowhere near as beautiful.

Rosalie was also holding a match next to the string. "No

one is allowed to be as gorgeous as me! And if anyone is

going to marry Ken, it's going to be ME!" she screamed,

looking quite deranged.

Emmett and Jasper were several aisles over, barely

containing their laughter as they watched the entire

charade.

For a moment I wondered where Edward was, but then he

came running into the aisle yelling, "NOO!" He skidded to

a stop in front of Rosalie, a scared look in his eyes.

"I'll do anything, Rose!" He begged."Anything for you to

let her go!"

Rose laughed manically. "Never!" She struck the match,

which burned straight through the string and sent Malibu

Barbie tumbling straight into the pool of "sharks".

"NOOOOO!" Edward screamed again, anguished.

Rosalie leapt up, and darted out of the aisle screaming,

"REVENGE! SWEET REVENGE!"

Edward threw himself to the ground in front of the tiny

pool, sobbing into his hands. A hand rested on his shoulder,

and he looked up to see the voice of God woman. "Relax,

dear child," She told him in a reedy voice. "God will send

you a message telling you it will be okay." She motioned

toward the speaker that was directly above them and she

shuffled off.

As Emmett and the other approached us as the crowd

dissipated, the voice of the employee Bella came over the

intercom.

"Get over it."

She must have seen the whole charade, I thought.

"I told you God would give you a message!" The old

woman called.


	16. Chapter 16

_**BPOV:**_

"Emmett, it's your turn." Rosalie grinned at him. He

grinned back at her. "There is nothing I can't handle."

Edward raised his eyebrows. "Ok, except for that psycho

stalker girl." Emmett relented. "And the God voice lady."

Edward chuckled. "Her name is Esther, by the way." Jasper

and Alice laughed. "Good to know she finally has a name!"

Alice giggled in her tinkling voice.

"What do I have to do?" Emmett asked impatiently. "You

have to go up to random people and yell curse words at

them." Rosalie told him smugly.

Edward groaned slightly. "How would that make us look,

Rose? What if someone from Forks is here? That would be

bad on Carlisle's part."

"Don't be such a wimp, Edward!" Alice laughed.

I smiled at Edward. "Just relax, okay? It'll be ok." Edward

smiled back at me. "Fine, Emmett," he said. "Go ahead."

Emmett jumped up and began running down the aisle.

Before anyone of us could get up, Emmett had already

screamed, "HOLY SHIT!"

We could hear a young boy laughing at him as Emmett ran

past him.

"ASS!" He roared again. "DAMN IT!"

By now, all of us were in stitches as Emmett swore like a

sailor to everybody he passed. "BITCH!" He yelled at poor

Esther.

She looked totally horrified when Emmett ran by. For a

moment, I thought she was going to have a heart attack.

Then she just shrugged and continued with her business.

Weird lady.

When Emmett came back over to us, his already huge grin

was even bigger. "Look who it is." He said, and pointed

over my shoulder.

I turned around to see Mike Newton himself stroll into the

store with Jessica standing next him, his arm around her

waist.

"This is too good to pass up!" Jasper grinned evilly. "What

should we do?"

They all shrugged. I can't believe they had no ideas for

pranks! "I have one!" I told them.

Every head turned toward me. "Here's what you have to

do….." I whispered as Emmett began laughing.


	17. Chapter 17

Within a few minutes we had all of the props set up. "Are

you ready?" I whispered to Emmett several aisles over. I

knew he could hear me, so I didn't have to reveal myself to

Mike, who was just coming around the corner.

"I'm going to go get some hygiene products," Jessica told

him as they approached the aisle. "I'll be right back."

Perfect. Mike would be alone.

Mike grunted with a slightly disgusted look on his face; he

had no interest in Jessica's monthly problems.

We had set up a large doll on the shelf in front of Mike. We

had purposely styled the doll's long black hair to where it

was hanging down her face with only one eye showing.

We had also placed a high-tech walkie-talkie behind it so

we can speak to Mike and he wouldn't know it.

Emmett once again had the video camera ready so he could

put it up on YouTube when it was finished.

Mike strode down the aisle, and once he was in front of the

doll, Alice spoke into the walker-talkie in a childish voice.

"Hi, Mike."

Mike froze, his eyes darting around until they rested on the

doll. His eyes widened. Alice spoke again, barely

containing her laughter. "I'm the little girl from the well,

and I'm coming for you."

Mike staggered backward, trying hard not to scream again

and embarrass himself. The Jasper crept up behind him and

did his trademark raspy whisper, "Seven days…." As Mike

whirled around, he was hit in the face with a handful of

skittles.

He didn't even see who it was before Jasper dashed away.

We were roaring with laughter at the sight of Mike Newton

dashing past Jessica on his way to the doors.

Esther was at his heels yelling, "It was the voice of God!"

"How did she get over here?" Edward asked, still laughing.

I'm not sure I even want to know.


	18. Chapter 18

Now that we had once again succeeded in pranking Mike,

we needed new ideas on things to do.

Alice had left a few minutes ago. She had said, "We've

been at Wal-Mart for hours and I haven't bought a single

thing! I'll be back later!" Rosalie had followed her, so it

was just Emmett, Edward, Jasper, and I.

We were once again sitting in the recliners in the furniture

section, pondering new ideas.

"We can put bags of candy in random people carts."

Emmett suggested.

"Boo." Jasper replied and blew Emmett a raspberry with

his thumbs down. Jasper was becoming increasingly bored

with each lame suggestion Emmett came up with.

"What am I supposed to do then?" Emmett snapped. "Dress

and drag and hit on men?"

Edward and Jasper froze. "That's brilliant!" Edward

grinned.

"Luckily I saw this coming then!" Alice danced over with

plastic bags full of women's dresses. "That's why you and

Rose went shopping?" I guessed. "Of course!" Alice

grinned. "There was no way that I would pass this up."

Emmett groaned. "There's no getting out of this, is there?"

He asked Rosalie. "Nope." She replied, popping the last

syllable. She grinned at him, as he sadly shuffled toward

the dressing rooms.

"What's taking him so long?" Rosalie asked impatiently.

"This is ridiculous."

I grinned. I had a feeling Emmett was taking as long as he

could, so everyone would grow tired of the challenge.

"Just wait." Edward told everyone. Suddenly, Emmett

groaned loudly. I threw my hand over my mouth to stifle

the giggles that were threatening to explode out any second.

Several women that were either waiting for dressing rooms

or just passing by, stopped and stared at the dressing room

with puzzled expressions on their faces.

Then Emmett spoke in a high girly voice, "There's no toilet

paper in here!"

That did it. I leaned over, my hands pressed firmly against

my sides, as we all were howling with laughter, even

though Emmett was several aisles over.

Some of the women sighed and groaned with disgust as

they left the area. Employee Bella came over and pounded

on the door. "Sir or Ma'am, you need to leave. Your

business needs to be done in the can, not in the dressing

rooms."

Emmett threw open the door, which bounced off of Bella's

forehead. She staggered away as Emmett appeared in a

flowered dress with a blond wig on and bright red lipstick.

The Cullens all shuddered as he approached us. "I'm

scarred for life." Edward whispered. "I have bad mental

images in my head now."

Alice, on the other hand stood up. "Now you have to go hit

on every male customer with corny pick-up lines until we

tell you to stop."

Emmett groaned and pranced down the aisle.

A huge buff guy then crossed into Emmett's path and

Emmett said to him, "If I told you your body was beautiful,

would you hold it against me?"

Jasper and the others were in hysterics, but I was nearly

rolling in the aisle. Before the man could reply, (or punch

him), Emmett darted off to harass another man.

He came up to another one and said, "Can I have your

phone number? I seem to have lost mine." "Uh….no." The

man replied. He quickly ran in the other direction.

Then I called, "Emmett!" He turned around, and I pointed

to Jacob, the poor man I harassed earlier.

Emmett grinned evilly and darted over to him. So far, his

girlfriend Bella was nowhere in sight. Emmett pressed his

huge body up against Jacob and said, "If you were a new

hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous."

By now, I was screaming with laughter. Jacob seemed to

freeze. "Er, can I help you, Ma'am? Or sir?"

Emmett then breathed into his ear, "That's a nice shirt. Can

I talk you out of it?"

Jacob shivered when Emmett's cold breath hit his neck.

However, his girlfriend Bella, who has just come around

the corner, didn't see it that way.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" She screamed.

"WHY ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH A

TRANSVESTITE? ARE YOU A SEX ADDICT?"

Jacob seemed to cower under her gaze as Emmett darted

away, shaking with laughter.

When Emmett tried to approach another man, Esther, the

Voice of God woman, came up to him and pressed her

seventy-something year old body against him.

He froze. "You look gorgeous as a woman." Esther told

him. "For the record, I bat for both teams."

Edward and Jasper were roaring with laughter as Izzy,

Emmett's stalker, came running around the corner with face

paint covering her face and holding a plastic sword.

"AI-EE-AI-EE-AI!" She bellowed a high-pitched battle

cry. "Keep your hands off of my man, you old hag!"

Emmett ripped off the dress as he ran toward us. "Help

me!"


	19. Chapter 19

When Emmett finally managed to get away from Izzy and

Esther, and he was literally shaking where he stood.

"I don't ever want to see her again!" He exclaimed as Rose

rubbed his back in comfort, fighting back a laugh.

However, Jasper and Alice were howling at the look on

Emmett's face. He then looked up and said, "Edward, your

turn."

Edward shrugged and removed his arm from my waist.

"Bring it on." "What does he have to do?" I asked Emmett

eagerly.

"He has to go up to a guy and pretend he hasn't seen him in

years." Emmett said smugly.

Edward immediately stood up. "No problem."

As he strode around the store, I turned to Alice. "Who is he

going to pick?"

"You'll see," She sang excitedly. "This is going to be

good!" Her pixie frame bounced up and down in the

recliner she was sitting in.

We followed Edward discreetly around the store as he

looked at prospective victims.

He then grinned evilly and approached our friend Jacob,

who had managed to reconcile with his girlfriend Bella.

It wasn't going to last long. Alice was right; this was going

to be good!

As he approached Jacob, Jacob grew wary and Bella's eyes

narrowed.

Edward gasped. "Oh my God, is it you?"

"What?" Jacob said, confused. Bella was now getting

angry.

"It is you!" Edward exclaimed. "I haven't seen you in so

long! Why haven't you called?"

Jacob's face melted into an expression of horror before-

"WHO THE HELL IS THIS GUY?" Bella screamed.

"HOW COME YOU SEEM TO KNOW ALL OF THESE

MEN?"

"Bella please-" Jacob tried to explain. "DON'T YOU

"BELLA" ME!" She roared. "ARE YOU OR ARE YOU

NOT GAY?"

Edward turned around and strode back to us without

looking back.

Emmett tried to say something, but Edward held up a hand.

"Wait."

"YOU ARE STILL A MANWHORE!"

We all began laughing at Jacob's misfortune. I am surprised

they hadn't broken up by now.

As we began rounding the store to look for new victims, the

intercom came on. It was an announcement about a cleanup

in the canned foods.

Esther just happened to be standing right next to us at the

time.

She threw herself on the ground, and I'm sure you all know

what happened next.

"It's the voice of God!"

Alice played along with the charade too. She also threw

herself to the floor, keeping up the appearance she created

hours ago.

"Oh God! He's speaking to us!"

"Alice, why on earth would you encourage her?" Edward

asked, as if they were talking about a small child. "Because

it was funny!" Alice retorted, still laughing.

The rest of us were walking around the entire store,

contemplating new ideas and victims. "Maybe we could

prank Jacob and Bella again!" Emmett practically yelled.

"No." Jasper and Rose said simultaneously. "We need to

prank Mike Newton again is what we need to do."

I grinned and said, "We should reunite him and the clown."

The Cullens stopped in the middle of the aisle and stared at

me, stunned. "That's a good idea, love." Edward told me.

Emmett nodded eagerly. "There's a costume store not far

away! We could get masks for all of us to wear!"

He and Jasper took off towards the doors, like little kids at

an amusement park.

"They will be back in a few minutes." Alice assured me.

"We need to get ready, since this will be our last prank at

Wal-Mart." Her face grew sad, as did Rosalie's.

"Why?" Edward asked. Alice must have been blocking her

mind because she said, "You'll see." She then grinned.

"This will be good."

A few minutes later, Emmett and Jasper came back with

black bags that read, MIKE'S PARTY STORE.

Edward and I laughed out loud. "This will definitely be

good."

Emmett and Jasper immediately pulled out two very scary

clown masks from one of the bags and walked off in

different directions.

I reached in and pulled out one that resembled a clown I

saw in a Stephen King movie a while back. I shivered at the

memory.

"I want to be IT!" Alice screamed and snatched the mask

out of my hand.

"No, sure Alice, you can have it." I told her after she put it

on and ran away towards the toy department. I had a feeling

she was going to scare a lot of children.

Edward, Rose and I put on the remaining masks and

distributed ourselves in different parts of the store.

The plan was set and in motion…


	20. Chapter 20

As Mike was strolling through the men's clothes, Emmett

had hidden himself amongst the racks. I was surprised he

managed to fit there.

Mike passed by the rack Emmett was hiding in. He had

placed his head in the position where it was just visible

enough that someone would notice.

He then stopped suddenly and whirled around. Emmett had

vanished. Mike shrugged. "Hmm. Must have been my

imagination."

He strode off and then came to the electronics. He started

looking at the various music players they had stocked

behind the protective glass. Edward stood behind him then,

holding a fake knife.

Mike whirled around again, but Edward was already gone.

Looking wary, Mike again left, murmuring to himself.

"Creepy."

Next, he stopped at a sunglasses display and began trying

some on. I don't know why he needed them; there was

hardly any sun here. Besides, he didn't look good in them

anyway.

Now Rosalie and I stood behind him, wearing the mask. He

glanced at Rose and me in the mirror and gasped. Rosalie

and Edward pulled me away before he turned around.

Then he stepped into the men's room, where Jasper was. A

few moments later, he came out, practically running, his

hands still covered in soap.

What a flashback…

I then knew Jasper had shown himself. This was turning

out perfect. As Mike worked his way over to the toys, I

could see younger children running out, with scared looks

on their faces. Alice.

Mike now was standing in front of the board games,

comparing Battleship and Risk. Alice skipped up behind

him. She had actually dressed in the full clown suit with big

orange puff balls down the front of her silver suit. She was

also holding a bunch of balloons.

She tapped his shoulder. "Would you like a balloon?"

Mike froze and turned around very slowly. His eyes

widened, before he let out a blood-curdling scream of

horror.

Alice followed him down the aisle, toward the doors.

Suddenly, she skidded to a halt, the puff ball bouncing.

The rest of us did too, for standing in front of us was the

reason why Alice said this would be our last Wal-Mart

prank.

It was Carlisle.


End file.
